Dear Facebook: I Am Not A Stalker!

I think I found the blog  Go Cheap or Go Home by typing in “frugal mom blogs” into my search bar.  A fellow redhead, she shares my love of living on the cheap whenever possible.  She also doesn’t eat processed foods, something that I have attempted and kind of sort of do when I can but not nearly as much as I should.  She’s cool, and she writes a cool blog that can help you save money, so what’s not to like?

Below is a bit about Denise.


Here’s Denise! Hi Denise!

Denise calls herself a Frugal Living blogger, but really she just likes shopping.  She is by no means a “crazy couponer” who will drop everything to throw a manufacturer coupon on top of a store coupon to pay $1 for Shampoo on sale at Target.  But she has been known to go to extreme measures to save a buck, such as making her kids S-H-A-R-E, or worse, flat out telling them NO.  Every once in a whole, she will share a good four ingredient recipe that even your kids will eat.  Denise likes wine, the cheaper the better, as long as its not Boone’s Farm.

Denis was nice enough to jump at the chance to guest blog for me even though she is pretty busy herself.  I’m planning on returning the favor as soon as possible!  Here’s her post:

There is this dude, who I dated in college. He was a nice enough guy, and we had a “fun” relationship- nothing serious, no drama, no bad breakup, whatever, and for some reason now, I am friends with this guy on Facebook. I really don’t know why? We were no longer dating for a good 7 or 8 years when I actually joined facebook, and he even later than that. We don’t live in the same town, and I’ll probably never run into him out of sheer coincidence.


He does own his own business. Maybe at some time I thought it would be a good networking tool to be his facebook friend? As if I would go and work for my COLLEGE boyfriend one day?

I don’t know. It is making less and less sense to me now. And even less because we aren’t those kinds of facebook friends that witty-banter, or like pictures of each other’s “adorable” kids (Oh, mine are soooo much more adorable. No mine are. No mine are. Just kidding. He doesn’t even have kids. I win.). I don’t know if we even throw a “Like” on any updates for each other that often.


Oh yeah, I remember. He was getting married soon. I may have just been curious about his wedding. From what I can tell, his wife is adorable. Oh wait. I really am a Facebook stalker now, huh?? Only from what I have seen that he has posted! She’s cute, she’s not fat- or what ever degrading comment people try to make about an ex boyfriend’s new fiance.

I think they had a cool wedding. I dunno. I wasn’t invited. I only saw it in facebook pictures..


Okay, hmm. I should stop now, huh? I was trying to go somewhere with this. I can’t really say where that was anymore. Oh yeah. This really doesn’t get much better though.

A few weeks ago, I noticed he posted a picture of a trip to Napa Valley. Of COURSE I looked at the picture. It was Winter and Grey and Cold and MISERABLE, and of course I wanted to see a picture of someone’s vacation to Napa. Anyone’s!!

And then…. because I looked at that picture, his next one showed up in my feed. And next one. And pretty much his whole Facebook journal of the thing, which turned out he was more or less recording and adding to Facebook in Real-time.

Hello, Gruesome accident on the interstate that no one can turn their head away from? This is the college ex-girlfriend stuck at home with her kids watching your Wine Country Vacation on Facebook. Ummm. Yeah…


I haven’t actually been to Napa, but I’ve been to Sonoma. I thought they were more or less the same when I booked the reservations, forever years ago. They aren’t, but I thought I chose the better one. I looked at his pictures, and still thought, yep, I chose the better one. And at first that just meant the Wine Country, but the more, and more, and MORE pictures he posted, I kept thinking YUP, I chose the better one, and I’m pretty sure I didn’t just mean the Wine Country vacation anymore.

On their last day, they went to San Francisco. He posted a status update and I admit, I waited for the pictures to follow later in the day. I actually expected it to feel like a punch to the gut, seeing one of the places I Love MOST in the world, and people who aren’t me having fun there.

There was no Golden Gate. No Alcatraz. No Seals, no ChinaTown, no Powell and Main Trolley cars. I don’t know what they did there; it wasn’t what I wanted to see. I closed the album. I was done. So what if he was off on a couples vacation while I sat at home, mopping, again, and potty training a 1 year old? I didn’t need his facebook version of San Francisco, I have my own little slice of heaven right here.

So maybe there is value in being Facebook-friends with an ex, after all??

Thanks to my Sadder-But-Wiser girl for letting me be a guest on her blog today! Today’s post was a vacation topic for me, as I normally right about trying to stay frugal, really, I’m just Cheap, over at Go Cheap or Go Home. We’re kicking off spring with some awesome giveaways today, so please take a minute to stop by and say hello, instead of using that time to facebook stalk someone!!

12 thoughts on “Dear Facebook: I Am Not A Stalker!

    • I am only friends with one ex-bf on Facebook. I can’t say that I have stalked much, I have “Facebook spied” on people I went to school with though if their profile allows. People I am not ACTUALLY Facebook friends with. *hangs head in shame*

  1. Hi all of you awesome readers! Thank you for guessing up with me!! We DO do it! It’s gets us through the day. What else is FB for, really?? And to the person who said I have good hair. Wow, you Rock. Thank you for that. Who needs the Embarcadero anyways?!!

  2. I’ve definitely stalked exes on Facebook. I even found out that a guy I thought I was dating was in a new relationship with a different girl thanks to the change in his relationship status on Facebook. We don’t talk anymore for some reason….

  3. Frickety frick, this post was awesome!

    I could actually see you clicking on each photo and being like “Crap!” but then looking at it and continuing on. I mean, what else were you supposed to do?! Facebook was telling you to keep looking.

    My favorite part? Your disappointment with their San Fran part of the trip. Hi-larious! I have no idea why that made me laugh so hard, but it did. And for that, I thank you.

    P.S. I also secretly look at my high school boyfriend’s profile sometimes, although he doesn’t do much with it. His wife has one and I was friends with her in high school too so I look sometimes at what could have been. Um, I’m FAR happier with my life now. So, I guess I can say “thank you, Facebook.”

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