Spring: A Performance Review

From: The Management
To:  Spring
CC:  Mother Nature, Winter, Summer, Autumn

Dear Spring:

I would like to take some time to discuss your job performance beginning May 1st, 2013.

I woke up this morning, May 2nd, to this:

IMG_1809 I did some checking, and I was dismayed to see this:

Stupid weatherUpon further review, I then found this:

stupid weather 2Last year at this time your performance was much better.  As a matter of fact, you exceeded expectations.  You were superior in almost every way.  Here are two examples of things that we were doing last year at this time.



Picking weeds, um, flowers.

Picking weeds, um, flowers.

Your performance the last couple of days is simply unacceptable and fails to meet the minimum standards that we strive for. After much consideration, I’m putting you on probation for the remainder of your contract.  If you fail to meet expectations, I have no choice but to let you go.

So if I were you, I’d get to work…


The Management

Now that I’ve got you all worried about what poor Spring’s fate will be, hop on over to Theme Thursday at Something Clever 2.0 and see what’s going on over there this week.  I am not participating today, but there are some other great bloggers who are!  Now I’m going to hide under my blankets all day as the snow shows no signs of letting up…



40 thoughts on “Spring: A Performance Review

  1. I think if that was my weather, I would scream or at least not be too happy at all. It is finally seemingly Spring and just so hoping it doesn’t leave us now. I promise to try to send some better weather your way though.

  2. If it were me, I’d fire Spring! She never shows up much around here anyway. I bet you will never forget this birthday when it snowed. My birthday is later this month, and it usually rains, but never snows.

  3. At least you found a way to take a stinky situation and find the humor in it. It’s weird how we always seem to be at opposite ends of what is considered normal. 85 one year on May 1 and 35 the next. Crazy!!

  4. Oh, I remember last year well. The magnolias were blooming in March and they’ve just opened up this past week this year! Spring needs to get its ass in gear before summer arrives.

  5. Dear Spring,
    It’s not me, it’s you. We are downsizing. Times are tough. We will be happy to geive you a nice severence package for the next 3 days. After that you’re on your own!
    Don’t call for a reccommendation,

    This was a great one!! I don’t want you to hate me, but here in San Diego it ws 78 degrees. It’s ok if you want to fire me too;)

  6. Thank goodness we don’t have snow, but we do have the squishy, rainy weather. I just keep thinking o how awesome it is for the garden! Our moonflower vine grew two inches overnight!!

  7. Dude, that is rough! It is only cold and raining here in Chicago. Snow. I’d quit, forget mother nature, I’d through in the towel myself!

  8. Pingback: The I’m Older Weekly Wrap-Up | The Sadder But Wiser Girl

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