Cable Makes Me A Better Person

autumn-leavesI really think I need to make a new award.  It would go to the person who is not related to me or knows me in real life that has followed me the longest.  Melissa from Motherhood is an Art would totally get that award if I created it.  Amongst all of the people who followed me from the start, she was the first blogger who truly read and commented on my posts!  I love her blog-I wish we were neighbors because I would love to be able to hang out with her (and her family)!  

This post is especially relevant for me because we recently were able to reclaim paid-for TV.  It’s not as extravagant as it sounds, since we just happened to find a local company that we could get cable AND internet for the same price as we were paying for just internet!  Read on to see why Melissa thinks cable improves her life:

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAWe recently subscribed to cable again after a 2 year hiatus from it. We cancelled it because it was so overpriced and the customer service is absolutely atrocious. Any one of my three children would be more gracious and helpful than most of the morons they have working for them.

But…..

I feel shallow for saying this but cable and the addition of the DVR (digital video recorder) option makes me a better person.

Today I thought I would share with you why cable has tickled my pickle:

  1. I usually miss every broadcast of the news. It is nice to record it and find out what is going on in the world.
  2. Speaking of finding out what’s going on in the world, everyone keeps talking about this Duck Dynasty show. It will be nice to know what they are talking about.
  3. Before cable if my children got hurt while I was watching a show they had to rate their pain and blood spewing amount on a scale of 1-10 to determine if I could wait until commercial to tend to them.
  4. On the subject of commercials…commercials work! Without cable I had to watch every commercial and let me tell you every time I saw an ad about any restaurant I was suddenly starving. Perhaps I can lose some weight now that I can fast forward through the commercials.
  5. The rewind feature is very important to me. Often times my kids are so noisy and I find myself wondering if the main character has just screamed, “I’m dying” or if it was just “I’m trying.” This can really change the whole story line.
  6. I really missed Mrs. Duggar, you know the lady with 19 kids. Sometimes I feel like torching the television when I see her and her sunny disposition all while keeping 19 kids in line. Other times it gives me the push I need…if she can put up with 19 kids and Jim Bob every day I can certainly handle my brood.
  7. Some days just require a Lifetime movie marathon complete with pajamas and endless chocolate.
  8. If I would have had the record feature on May 6, 2004 I could have avoided one of my biggest regrets. I saw every single episode of Friends except for the very last one. Talk about major bummer. When The Middle decides to call it quits I should be good even if I decide to go out that night.
  9. I actually have a lot more time on my hands. Instead of wasting an hour watching Dr. Phil so I can feel better about myself because I’m not the weirdest person in the world, I have shaved that time down to about 30 minutes with the fast forward feature.
  10. And the biggest reason I love cable is because sometimes you just need a laugh and the pause feature does that for me. I randomly hit the pause button when people are talking so I can see images like this:

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

IMG_1623Melissa is a mother to 3 kids living in Wisconsin. She navigates the triumphs and perils of motherhood using creativity and humor!

Like the post?  Now LOVE the blog.  Go visit her blog by clicking HERE!

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24 thoughts on “Cable Makes Me A Better Person

  1. Pingback: How I Became a Better Person | Motherhood Is An Art

  2. Hi Sarah, I’ve hopped over from Melissa’s blog which I absolutely love reading… This post is really hilarious, made me laugh! I can definitely relate to #s 1, 4, especially number 5! Then there’s 7, 9 and 10! Look forward to exploring your blog too! All the best, D.

  3. Hahaha! Great post Melissa! I LOVE my cable…Love, Love, Love! I don’t watch the news because it’s all bad and sad and depressing. My bad? Hubby thinks so. And I absolutely LOVE to hang out in PJ’s and just watch TV. And because I don’t have one of those DVR thingies, when I’m watching something that I really need to hear, I become unapproachable. As soon as I hear someone coming and saying, “Mama?”, I put up my hand as if to stay STOP and loudly say, “NO”! Or, “If you don’t want to watch this, I do. So go!”. I am bad! Unlike you Melissa, cable does not make me a better person!

  4. Oh Melissa – what a great list! I think that you have made several valid points – but more importantly, I’m not sure how you survived without having half a dozen Mickey Mouse Club, Disney Princesses or Bob the Builder recorded to turn on for the kids when you just need 30 minutes to get supper finished!! You’re a better mom than me! 🙂 Great job!

  5. Interesting. We cut the cord 10 months ago and love the 100 dollar a month savings we are enjoying. Although I do miss the pause button on the live, over the air, tv, I find that we pretty much have our needs met with streaming and watch less tv now and spend more time on other things but if cable works for you then go for it.

  6. The pausing! Yes! My husband thinks I have this extraordinary talent for pausing the TV at just the right moment- I always catch someone mid-blink.

  7. It sounds like the DVR has been a good thing for you. Watching at your own time, pace, etc. can help you budget your schedule.
    Cable gives to all. I’d leave Lifetime to my wife, ESPN for me and Disney for the kids. Yes, I am stereotyping but you know what I mean.

  8. I couldn’t agree more! I need my cable back!!!! Maybe someday 😦 We cancelled for the same reason, but still need to allocate the resources elsewhere. Meanwhile I will live vicariously through you!

  9. Ah, #6, good lord, #6. For me, that’s a reason NOT to have television. But just my opinion! But seriously, we haven’t had televsion for two years either, and I totally get what you mean about not having any clue what people are talking about.

  10. Melissa, as usual this post was great. I related to the bit about missing out on the news because that’s usually dinner time and it really isn’t suitable viewing for kids. I recently bought myself a pair of fancy shmancy PJs for my PJ days. I thought I could also call them “office attire”. Had a great laugh reading this while at home with the flu after packing the kids off to my parents’ place after considerable protest. Mum goes into hospital next week and doesn’t want the germs up her way. xx Ro

  11. Pingback: Cable Makes Me A Better Person | The Bloppy Blo...

  12. We didn’t pay for cable for the first few years of marriage. We did get it a couple of years ago. The DVR feature is a lifesaver! My husband is no longer ready to do a gorilla dance every time one of the children loudly squeals across the room or does a dance in front of the screen at the most pivotal point in his precious shows. He merely grunts and rewinds. Beautiful peace! 😉

  13. The ONLY shows I watch these days are on cable:
    Dexter (series finale sucked)
    True Blood
    Homeland
    Nurse Jackie
    Californiacatoin
    etc…

    So good. Also. THAT PIC YOU FROZE ON. That’s Chealsea Handler? OUCH. More Botox please. holy crap.

  14. Pingback: Weekly Wrap-Up: The Double Extra Special Edition | The Sadder But Wiser Girl

  15. Thank God for cable as most regular TV on the commercial channels, 2-11, really sucks! The best shows are on the cable channels. I hate when our cable goes on the fritz!

  16. so funny! And TRUE!! Loved this guest spot and now I have just met someone else through dear Melissa who I’m beginning to think is a super star! Now to browse The sadder but wiser and find out more. I’m for sure going to be a reader of yours too.

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