December | 2014 | The Sadder But Wiser Girl

Welcome to the December edition of the Fly on the Wall. If you haven’t been here before, here’s a simple explanation: These are snippets of life from my house. I am simultaneously posting these snippets along with other participating bloggers. Please, please, pretty please stop by the links of the other participants at the bottom of the post or you may find reindeer poop in your stocking!!!!!

We last left our superheroes starting to get ready for Thanksgiving dinner… We hosted Thanksgiving again this year. We had Evil Genius’s now traditional turkey in a bucket and the not so traditional turkey made of cheese, sausage, and crackers…

Words uttered the week of Thanksgiving: “It’s Tuesday. Do you know where your turkey bucket is?”

My parents came up for Thanksgiving. Can you tell who the dog was most taken with?

Conversations held on Thanksgiving in our house:

Me to the Professor: “Are your pants on inside out?”
The Professor: “Oh.” Looks down at his pants, inspects them for a bit. “I guess they are” (Goes right back to watching tv).
Evil Genius: “Go fix them please!”

Tell me, what is wrong with this picture?

Now we are busy prepping for Christmas here at the house of ~~nuts~~ Almond.

There was Christmas shopping. He bought himself an early present. He’s so good to him.

Here are the roles currently assumed by the people who occupy this place:

The Princess: Craft Nazi
The Professor: Christmas Expert
Evil Genius: Evil Baker and Evil Chef
Me: Space Occupier

The craft Nazi busy at work. She wants to do crafts every second of every day!

Me to The Princess: What are you going to make for Christmas gifts this year?
Princess: I don’t know.
Me (thinking I’m very smart and clever): Should we look on the internet for some ideas?
Princess: SURE!

I pull out my laptop and stupidly google “homemade gifts kids can make”. At search result #1, she gasps. At result #2 she squees… At result #154 she’s still ooing and ahhing.

An hour later, it’s quite apparent that she wants to make ALL the presents.
“All” as in every.single.craft on the internet. Be ready, people, be ready for all the crafts!

Evil Genius gets back from the ISU game to see me frantically trying to paint The Princess’s nails because it was bedtime and we had almost run out of time to do it.

Evil Genius: “I thought Moms enjoyed doing that with their daughters?”
Me: *Angry glare as I manage to paint my thumb holiday red*

Christmas nails.

Princess: Daddy what’s in these enchiladas?
Evil Genius: Chicken, sour cream, cheese, cumin-
Princess: Ew, HUMAN????
Evil Genius: No, CUMIN!

Rest assured that all of the cooking the Evil Genius does is 100% human free!

One thing that has recently come out of the Evil Genius’s kitchen: Chocolate Peanut Butter trees! (Yes they washed their hands but apparently not their faces!)

Speaking of holidays, today marks a special day. After a few months of growth, my husband will finally be allowed to shave his beard. They were not allowed to even trim them lest pay the fine of $100! The picture below is almost three weeks old, so his beard is much scragglier even now. There will be a lot of happy wives this weekend. I hope to get a before and after picture that I can share!

He looks annoyed, but he loves it when she cuddles with him, because at least she’s warm!

That’s all I’ve got. Have a Happy Holiday! And be sure to check out the links down below this picture of Christmas cuties or they just might very well tell Santa on you!

This month’s Fly Participants. Give them a round of buzzzzzzzzzzzz…