Help is needed

We’ve been dealing with a lot these past few years.  On the advice of my long suffering therapist, I’m opening up a GoFundMe to try to help with some of the kiddos medical bills.  My husband has good insurance, but even with good insurance there are some pretty hefty bills.  Please read the story and share if you’d like.  Thank you!


CNS Warrior GoFundMe


Have you ever had an experience so bad that you feel like it’s completely ruined you?

That’s how I feel right now-ruined.

For those of you who don’t know me, I pretty much stopped blogging when I got a job.  At the same time, my daughter was starting kindergarten.

It started out swell but after a few years some things happened.  The Professor’s spinal tumors, surgery, rehabilitation, and radiation treatments.  The princess’s brain tumor.  And it was just never the same.  My part time job had deteriorated to the point that I was fighting for every hour I worked, was only working when my children were out of school (no family time), and I was being made to feel like I wasn’t part of their little social group.

I finally left after 6 and a half years.  I barely got a good-bye.  As a matter of fact when I turned in my resignation I barely got a response.  It was all so strange and surreal.  I felt very disposable and I’m not sure they even care that I’m gone.

A lot of what was being done to me I have no idea if it was really being done on purpose.  A lot of it was just lots and lots of gossip.  No positive feedback.  And very poor communication.  The work place was highly toxic.  And it has affected me greatly.

Now that I’m back in the world trying to move on I’m having a hard time with it.  The negativity in my head is paralyzing.  Every time I look at a job description I panic.  I feel like there’s no way I’ll ever be able to be good enough to do it.  I’m trying to get back into writing, but freelancing for money.  I joined many writer’s groups but again I feel overwhelmed with everything.

I want mom hours… I have a handicapped kid who needs to get places.  I have an 11 year old who tends to be pushed to the wayside a lot because of my schedule.  This is important to me.  But I feel like I’m appearing lazy because I need to take care of my kids.  This time last year I thought my 11 year old might not live to see another year or two because of the tumor. Thankfully that situation has been downgraded.  But we really don’t know what’s going to happen.  Things could change.  When my son was having surgery and rehabilitation I tried my best to work everything around my schedule, but ultimately I should have been there for him, not at work.

I’ve always been one who’s not afraid to work hard.  I used to work full time and then after the first job would go to my second job.  But at the moment I’m not sure I really want to do anything.  Just work on my house and maybe find some projects here and there that I can write for money.  Have I changed? Am I lazy?

We need money.  Period.  But at the moment we deferred some students loans and we have some in collection that we haven’t figured out, and we’re doing ok.  There’s nothing extra, but that’s the way it was even when I was working.  I was getting so few hours.

I suppose I need to talk to my therapist.  I need to work through this.  I need to get to the point where I’m feeling comfortable with myself again.  At the moment I feel like I have no skills and nothing to contribute to anyone.

I feel like I’m at a critical point in my life.  I don’t really know what I want to do. I don’t have a burning desire to do much of anything.  I know I want to write, but can I do it consistently?  I want to edit, but can I find a job doing that?  I DO know I want consistent income and stability, but I’m not sure how I can achieve that.

My only job offers have been at the local gas station, and a mention of an editor job that as of yet has not materialized.  I mean I applied at Menards… because it has mom hours.  I heard nothing.  Do I want to work at Menards as a career?  Oh no-but it pays decently and I could still be there for my kids.  I’ve had leads about a bank job, but it wouldn’t allow me to take my son to physical therapy each week.

So I just don’t know.

HAve you ever felt ruined?  Have you ever been in this situation?  What steps did you take to help yourself out?  Did anything good come out of it?

Right now I am desperate for anything that might help me get out of this funk, so please regale me with some of your successes.

Traveling at the Speed of Gossip

So71c78c054269449f0876050673549af0 my life is so interesting these days that apparently people come out of the woodwork when I do things.  Or rather, when I do things wrong.

*sarcasm*  My life is FAR from interesting.

Who hasn’t had something happen that they’ve just had to vent about?  It has nothing to with anyone else, just a crappy thing that happens.  And something crappy did happen.

So me, being human, posted about said crappy thing on Facebook.

You see, I can’t actually go into detail about the crappy thing, because later on I got called out for it.  I don’t want anymore hurt feelings or people thinking that I’m attacking their good name or anything like that.  BUT THAT’S NOT WHAT HAPPENED!

I was simply venting about something that happened.  And later on told the tale of how it was resolved.  And my life went on.

But apparently other people’s lives stopped in their tracks.  They had to be sure to tell my tale of woe.  I wouldn’t be surprised if someone had written a sonnet about it.  Something happened, because a couple of weeks later I was told that if I posted negative things about my place of employment that I needed to follow it up with something positive.

I made sure I told this person I did indeed tell how the situation was resolved.  She said she didn’t see that part, and the damage was already done.


Naturally I had to go back and read my post… and then I deleted it.  I felt bad.  This had nothing to do with anything or anyone else, just a crappy day.

And then I started to overthink, because that’s what I’m very good at.  If people are watching my page, waiting for me to post the wrong thing so they can run and tell the person that they think I’m talking about the things that I’m actually not talking about, then maybe I need to not post anything remotely work oriented on my page at all.

So I simply announced that I wouldn’t be sharing work related items on my personal page anymore, and politely directed people to my organization’s work page where they can see all of the wonderful things going on.

By the way, I’m reiterating here that this is on MY PERSONAL PAGE.  My place of work has their own page.

Remember that episode of The Big Bang Theory where Sheldon and Amy conduct an experiment to see how fast gossip spreads?  This literally took minutes to reach my place of work.  Apparently I pissed some people off?  One person called my boss to tell her the shocking thing I had posted.  Another person took a screen shot of my post and sent it to her.  She confronted me and asked what was wrong…

I tried to explain the situation to her, who by the way is not on Facebook.  And that I am still maintaining the business page, I’m just NOT SHARING WORK STUFF ON MY OWN PERSONAL PAGE!!!

It didn’t matter.  I had to take it down.  So I did.  Done, right?

The next day I issued an apology for my actions.  I explained that I had simply had a bad day and didn’t mean to offend anyone with the original post.  I did this because it was the right thing to do.  I left it up for a day, then took it down.

And people were still pissed.  I had to just move on, because life is too short to worry about this shit.  I have other things to worry about, like my son learning to walk again and an upcoming MRI to see if he has more spinal tumors.

I’m still not sharing anything work related on my page.  As a matter of fact, I took down every darn tootin thing that even referenced where I work.  Because I can, because it’s my personal page and I can post anything I want!

So what is it about social media these days?  Why is it ok to post some things and not others?  It’s nitpicky stuff like this that makes me wonder why I’m even on social media.  Yes I have to maintain the page for work, but the thought of deleting my Facebook account at times makes me feel awesome.

I’m a social wreck.  I can pass as a normal person as long as I don’t open my mouth. So maybe that’s the ticket-I shouldn’t say anything?

Here’s the thing-I quit blogging because of stuff like this.  Either someone was constantly telling me how to phrase things differently, or didn’t get my weird humor, or something like that.  My husband poked a lot of fun at me.  And I was falling into a deep depression.

I started seeing a therapist recently.  I needed it-between the cancer stuff and the work stuff and my son’s rehab and doctor’s appointments I was going bonkers.  And as we’ve been working through things it came back to writing.  She thinks I need to start writing again.  Just anything, anonymous if I’d like.

So tonight I did.  And it felt pretty damn good.

When you live in a small town where everyone knows everyone it’s hard to escape from the gossip.  But gosh darn it I’m going to try to my best!

Do you work in a small town?  Do you have to deal with the fall out over people overreacting to something you might have posted online? This is just the tip of the iceberg for me these days, but I’m dying to hear who else deals with this bullcrap too!

So if you’re easily offended and read this post and think that I may have written it about you, trust me, I didn’t.  It’s not you, it’s me.  The end.Move-on-funny-quote

Supermassive Spinal Something

Hi my name is Sarah and I haven’t written my blog for a very very very long time.  Quick refresher-I am a part-time librarian and part-time writer in good old central Iowa.  I am married to an evil genius who makes cheesecakes and takes quantum physics for fun.  I have a 12 year old boy whom we refer to as the Professor, and a 9 year old girl whom we refer to as the Princess.  It becomes obvious once you start reading some of my posts…

This summer we went to visit cousins in Wisconsin, and the Professor was doing his usual loping run as he tried to keep up with his sister and boy cousins.  My cousin’s husband turns to my husband and I and asks “Does he have one leg longer than the other?”

We shrugged and said that he’s just really uncoordinated, and life went on.

Several months later I revisit that conversation in my head and think “Hmmmm… why DIDN’T we notice that before?”

As it turned out, the Professor did indeed have one leg longer than the other.  As well as one leg more developed than the other.  And scoliosis.  This apparently was just the tip of the iceberg.

After our leisurely vacation, things must return to their normal summer ways until school starts.  Part of our summer fun was to have well child check-ups to get them over with before school starts.  Yay FUN!

Both kids had good appointments, except that the Princess didn’t get 100% on her eye exam and she was PISSED.  The Professor had a little bit of a curve in his spine.  The doctor looked him over and said to go up to x-ray and have them take some film of his spine.

Scoliosis.  A 23% curvature.  Apparently they refer at 20%.

It’s probably nothing.  Several friends of mine had children that had scoliosis.  They go see a doctor who says to keep an eye on it, and that’s it until the next six months.

So we went to a Pediatric Orthopedist in another town about 45 minutes from here.  He was very thorough.  Took many more x-rays.  Pointed out that one leg was longer than the other.  And more developed.  And to be safe he schedule an MRI for us.  Just to get a closer look if something is causing the scoliosis.  You know, just a precaution.

So we got an MRI.  It went off without a hitch, except that he had to pee in the middle of it.  Perfectly normal for the Professor, I promise.

Two days later I’m shoving cans into the machine at Hy-Vee when my phone rings.  It’s the pediatric orthopedist’s office.  The doctor is very friendly as always, but right away I get the feeling that something isn’t right.

“How do you think the MRI went?”  He asked cautiously.

“Ok I guess.  We weren’t there that long.  Is everything ok?”

“I was just wondering if you and your family is available to come down to my office.”

I look at my watch.  It’s lunchtime.  My children were eating lunch at school and my husband is an hour north at work, probably eating his lunch too.

“I can come down.  Is there something wrong?”

“This isn’t news I like to give over the phone.  I was really hoping to see you right away.”

I can feel all the blood draining away from my head.  “We could make arrangements to come in Monday.”

The doctor says calmly.  “The person who read the MRI called me right away.  You see there’s a mass of some sort in his spine.  I’ve already made a referral to the Children’s Hospital in Iowa City.  This is a situation that needs to be addressed immediately.”

At least I think that’s what he said, I was already drowning in my own sweat and panic.  I get off the phone with the doctor and immediately text my husband to please call me.

Five minutes go by and nothing.  “It’s about the MRI.  They found something.  Some thing.  In.his.spine.”

He calls.  I tell him.  We agree to go down on Monday with both kids, not sure if this is changing our lives forever.

IN the meantime I’m still standing there in the bottle redemption room, holding beer bottles that aren’t my own, trying to force them into the little machines so I can have a few extra dollars.  At this point I am out of words, and just want to get my stupid little slips of paper so I can maybe get a coffee and a few extra groceries. Only I don’t give a crap about any of those groceries, because now I have to wait until next week to get what’s really going on with my son!

In walks the pastor of my former church with a bag of his own bottles.  He smiles, asks how I’m doing, and proceeds to start putting his stuff in the redemption machines.  I clutch my bag and say something idiotic and then follow that up with “Oh these aren’t mine.”

He winks, and tosses his empty bag in the trash.  “That’s right.  These weren’t mine either.  Have a good day.”

Next up:  “There’s something in his spine.  Some THING in his spine.”

Top Ten Reasons Why I Haven’t Written In Like… Years

  1. I got a dishwasher.  It’s amazing.
  2.  My kids are less interesting than they used to be.
  3. I decided to write Marvel fanfiction on Tumblr. (Really… true story… then I deleted the account.)
  4. I got a job that took 98% of my brainpower.
  5. Aliens…
  6. I got depressed.  Like… really depressed…
  7. Aliens…
  8. Solar flares
  9. Robert Downey Jr.
  10. There is just no excuse

Seriously folks… it’s hard to write when you feel like nothing in your life is funny.  But sometimes there’s something that just makes you spring back to life.

Is it funny?  No it’s not.  But it drove me to write, and that’s what matters.

My son is in 7th grade and my daughter is in 4th grade.

Stay tuned… things are about to get interesting…


Fly on the Wall June 2015: The Fried Ice Cream Edition

Fly on the Wall

That’s right, it’s that time of the month again… it’s Fly on the Wall!

Fly on the Wall is a monthly slice of awesomeness.  Participating bloggers share little snippets from their month all squished together into one post for your enjoyment, then put them up ALL AT THE SAME TIME JUST FOR YOU TO LOVE!

What’s not to like about that?

The cat doesn't care about Fly on the Wall...

The cat doesn’t care about Fly on the Wall…

So where have I been?  Last month I apparently spaced off telling Karen I wanted to do this so I didn’t make it onto the list.  I wasn’t hiding and I certainly wasn’t dead… I just forgot.  Me?  Forget?  That NEVER happens!

We had lots of birthdays since the last time you heard from me…First Evil Genius turned the big 4-0.  His request was Mountain Dew cupcakes.  Get cake mix, add Mountain Dew, what could possibly go wrong, right????

ADD people trying to follow modified directions?  HA!  The first batch turned out like water.  I soon figured out that you had to put the Mountain Dew IN PLACE of all the liquid in the cake mix. Duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

So not beautiful... but he seemed to like them.

So not beautiful… but he seemed to like them.

Birthday #2-mine.  I turned 41.  It was uneventful.

Yes... fried ice cream.  All the fried ice cream...

Yes… fried ice cream. All the fried ice cream…

Then last but certainly not least was The Princess’s birthday.  She also wanted to go out for fried ice cream because that’s what Mommy did.  She got to wear a sombrero (I had declined the sombrero for personal reasons.)

We like fried ice cream a lot, can you tell?

We like fried ice cream a lot, can you tell?

But there was also cake.  Her mommy made a cake.  Did her mommy tell you she made a cake?  This one turned out… ok.

I said it before and I'll say it again, I never professed to being a professional cake decorator.  The kid is cute anyway.

I said it before and I’ll say it again, I never professed to being a professional cake decorator. The kid is cute anyway.

We also finished school.  It’s kind of a big deal, because the older one will be attending middle school next year.  Hard to believe, huh?

Last day of school.

Last day of school.

Other things went on too…

I went out to the schools to promote summer reading with a neighboring library.  I got the pleasure of speaking to my son and daughter’s classes.  What question does my son raise his hand to ask her?
“So if my mom works at one library, do I HAVE to go to that library????”
Thanks kid, I love you too.

In case you didn’t know, the Tooth Fairy has business hours: Teeth lost after 5pm will be processed the next business day. She also thanks you for your patience, because your business is very important to her.


So Evil Genius got his hands on a Go-kart. Guess which one wanted to race it?

I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for supper last night because dammit I’m a grown-up.

My Mother’s Day gift-I requested that the kids do the dishes tonight.
The Professor (as soon as his father is out of earshot): I don’t remember how to wash dishes.

My cousin gave us shower notes.  Guess who has been using them?

My cousin gave us shower notes. Guess who has been using them?

Me: I got a reversible skirt at the consignment shop for $1.
Evil Genius:  What good is that? Who wants a skirt that only covers your stomach when you reverse it? That makes no sense whatsover…

The cat is after something in the stairway. After a moment I realize he’s after his shadow. Crazy, crazy cat.

Kitty does care about wrapping paper...

Kitty does care about wrapping paper…

The Professor:  I just wanted you to know something happened to my gum so I threw it away.
Me: What happened to your gum?
The Professor:  I don’t know. It was too chewy.

I’m leaving work the other day and the kids head out to the car ahead of me. I stopped to bring something back inside and see the kids are just standing outside by the car.
Me: What’s the matter, is the car locked?
The Princess: There’s a bug in there.
The Professor: We believe it could be dangerous.

Things I never thought I’d say #903: “You don’t need a Captain America shield to do yoga.”

I got my hair pertied... did I forget to mention that?

I got my hair pertied… did I forget to mention that?

I think I’ll stop there… Next month will be dedicated to the half marathon I didn’t die participating and other running things.  Because I can.  Now don’t YOU run away, check out the other blogs that are doing this too!                          Baking In A Tornado                          Spatulas on Parade                          Follow me home                          Menopausal Mother                        Stacy Sews and Schools                                   Battered Hope                                  Just A Little Nutty                                        The Momisodes                            Someone Else’s Genius                                Disneyland in Kentucky                            Juicebox Confession                               Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                                  Sanity Waiting to Happen                        Southern Belle Charm                   Searching for Sanity                                            Go Mama O              Eileen’s Perpetually Busy


Fly on the Wall April 2015: The Mutant Fly Edition

Fly on the WallHoly cow I think we have mutant flies. The biggest fly I’ve seen in a long time keeps landing on my screen. Heyyyyyyy wait a minute, I bet he wants to help me write my Fly on the Wall post!

Why would a fly want to help me write?  Let me explain a little about Fly on the Wall… In a nutshell, it’s snippets from life put together to make one post.  Participating bloggers then take said posts and all publish at the same time.  Magically at 10 am EST these posts all appear simultaneously once a month!  So read on to see what the fly and I wrote, then stick around and see what other bloggers wrote by clicking on one or two or ten of the links at the bottom of the post. 

So in other words, what fly WOULDN’T want to get in on that kind of awesomeness?  🙂

This is visual proof of why I get nothing accomplished often.  Cuddly animals and warm soft purple blankies.

This is visual proof of why I get nothing accomplished more often than not. Cuddly animals and warm soft purple blankies.

Me eating ice cream: “Oh ice cream how I love you! Why don’t I eat ice cream more often?”
Me two hours later: *In pain and crying* “Whyyyyyyy do I eat ice cream?????”

(Lactose intolerance, that’s why. It blows.)

That's about right... (From George Takei's Facebook page.)

That’s about right… (From George Takei’s Facebook page.)

Evil Genius to The Professor: “Did you learn anything at Baseball Camp today?”
The Professor: “Nothing that I can remember.”

Couldn’t find the library’s disposable silverware anywhere the other day at work. My choices to eat my mac and cheese were a big wooden spoon or a measuring spoon… I chose the measuring spoon.  It may have looked a little weird, but hey I was HUNGRY!

I'm the one in the purple hat.  I'm wearing three shirts and a jacket-it was COLD!  I finished 58th out of 78.  HEY I BEAT SOME PEOPLE!!!!

This is the 5K that we have in the spring in my town.  We literally can walk outside our door and participate.  I’m the one in the purple hat. It was so cold that I was wearing three shirts and a jacket! How’d I end up?  I finished 58th out of 78. HEY I BEAT SOME PEOPLE!!!!

Things not to do on the day of a 5K that you plan on actually running.
1) Drink orange juice beforehand
2) Eat blueberry waffles beforehand
3) Wear pants that won’t stay up
All bad things to do… trust me. *urp*

The Princess is learning to knit.  We have knitting needles and looms galore.  I'm still waiting for potholders.  Really, I seriously need her to make me some!

The Princess is learning to knit. We have knitting needles and looms galore. I’m still waiting for potholders. Really, I seriously need her to make me some!

*Stares at pair upon pair of black yoga pants in the laundry basket*  Is it possible to have an addiction to yoga pants?

IMG_3394The above picture is from Easter.  Why is my son wearing a button up shirt, tie, and vest?  Certainly not because we told him to. A friend gave us some of her son’s clothes that he had outgrown and he has been obsessed with that outfit ever since.  Every chance he’s got he’s tried to wear it.

The day before Easter… “Mom…”

Me without even hesitating:  “Yes you can wear the shirt and tie.”

He does look pretty cute, even though he started out wearing the shirt over a polo shirt.  He thought it would look extra nice.  We made him take it off.

Speaking of Easter, that bunny was definitely my favorite that weekend.

Speaking of Easter, that bunny was definitely my favorite that weekend.

Random things written on Facebook:

So apparently orange juice is not a viable alternative for milk in cream of chicken soup.

I really hate it when I find meat in my bra.

The Princess and I delivered cookies to my aunt and cousin in the Target parking lot recently. I’m now completely convinced that Girl Scout cookies are another form of crack. “You got the stuff?” “You got the cash?”

Yes those were my children walking to the bus stop in the pouring rain.  Brand new umbrella… Need I say more?

My pets... what a bunch of goofballs.

My pets… what a bunch of goofballs.

Me: “When I was a kid we used typewriters to type things because that was before they had computers for everyday use and things like ipads.”
The Princess: “Yeah. That was a long time before pencils too…”
Yes we etched everything on to a stone tablet…


Both kids are on orange teams this year! What a coincidence!

My daughter wanted to clean for fun this past weekend.  I don’t think she’s really mine.

Yep that’s right.  Mom has been slacking in the cleaning department.  For whatever reason, my depression has reared its ugly head once again and I feel like doing nothing.  But I’m happy to say that we spent the day cleaning up our kitchen and not only has it stayed that way, I did some more organizing this week!  Now I can’t say much for the rest of the house, but by golly our kitchen looks great!

I always feel at home at Target.  This week I have proof that they really know me there.

I always feel at home at Target. This week I have proof that they really know me there.

Back to the running… there is kind of a happy ending here.  The next 5K was a couple of weeks later.  It was for my husband’s Live Healthy Iowa thingie.  I did decently-and I ran the whole way!  I’m not so sure where I actually finished, I have yet to see any race results.  However the hubby was so proud he got me flowers.  And they’re tie-dyed!

Now he can get flowers for me for when I’m done with the half marathon on May 30th.  He can put them on my grave, because I’ll probably die.

11149822_10204567797971835_579512764931082934_oThis weekend is Evil Genius’s birthday.  He turns the big 4-0.  We will be attempting to make Mountain Dew cupcakes.  I’m sure there will be a good story in there for next month’s Fly on the Wall.  We actually have three birthdays between now and then!  How about that?

So that’s it, short and sweet this month.  Thanks for stopping by and reading…  And how much help was the fly?  At some point the dog ate him.  How’s that for appreciation?  Don’t worry about him, there are plenty more flies out there.  Take a look at some of the blogs below.  They are just buzzing with things for you to read!                          Baking In A Tornado                          Spatulas on Parade                          Follow me home                          Menopausal Mother                        Stacy Sews and Schools                                   Battered Hope                                  Just A Little Nutty                                        The Momisodes                            Someone Else’s Genius                                Disneyland in Kentucky                    Searching for Sanity                                Sanity Waiting to Happen                                   Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                         Juicebox Confession

Fly on the Wall March 2015: The Headache Edition

Fly on the WallFly on the Wall is a series of snippets from my life that won’t really make up a whole blog post by themselves, but certainly together make up a fun little bit of reading!  What’s unique about this is that participating bloggers all write their posts and they are put up simultaneously for your reading pleasure.  Except mine, because mine was late (see the next paragraph for an explanation below).  Anyhoo, the links to the other blogs are at the bottom of the post.  Please take some time to visit them all, they are wonderful (and funny) people!

So I took a month off from writing, I can’t say that a lot of interesting things happened…  And seriously my computer crashed when I was writing this.  Blue screen of death!  I panicked big time!  Fortunately after shutting it down and letting it sit for awhile, it seems to be okay.  Anyhoo…


Look who got an American Girl doll. Yep. She named her Lizzie.

One night I had a dream that I was at work and it snowed only it snowed inside and I was trapped at work because I couldn’t drive my car through the snow inside the BUILDING I WORK IN. I need help. Seriously.  I think I just needed Spring.


The Professor saw a commercial for what he thinks will be his new favorite thing: Bacon wrapped deep dish pizza.  Ew.


My evening spent with my husband ended with conversations about how agricultural sprayers would be advantageous in a zombie apocalypse (as opposed to a combine) and how it would feel to be kicked by a kangaroo.

All of that was just in time for Valentine’s Week. We’re so romantic.

My Valentine lovies.  Aren't they cute?

My Valentine lovies. Aren’t they cute?

So The Princess is in that stage where she is losing lots of teeth. Two teeth were lost in a short period of time at our house. This is a lot for a tooth fairy to keep up with.

Lost tooth one went three days without payment. Finally a pink bag with magical confetti hearts and four shiny quarters in it appeared on the fourth day, along with a letter of explanation. Apparently the tooth fairy had a tooth convention in Toothiana Texas.

Lost tooth two also went three days sans money. Finally a dollar miraculously appeared under Mommy’s pillow this morning. We’re thinking the tooth fairy was playing tricks. Or maybe got confused…

I’d like the record to show that the tooth fairy does not have a drinking problem. Also, my daughter is a very light sleeper.

The kids got Beanie Boos.  They're cute but a little creepy with their big eyes.  They love them.

The kids got Beanie Boos. They’re cute but a little creepy with their big eyes. They love them.

After supper I swear I heard my husband said “Great, now I can crap. I’ve been waiting and gathering things all day to do it.”

What he actually said was that he can “craft”. On Guild Wars, the online game that he plays. I’m still not sure which one actually makes more sense to me…


The Professor:  “What movie is this?”
Evil Genius: “Facing the Giants. Ever seen it?”
The Professor: Maybe I have. Unless I didn’t then I haven’t.


The Headache Diaries-Facebook entries made by me during the month of the headache:

Hi I’m Sarah, and this is my headache. Maybe I should name it? What is a good name for a headache that won’t go away?
And Coming soon, Headache, the Musical…


Evil Genius’s cheesecake: Now with divine healing powers.

I mean, yeah it’s always been heavenly and all, but tonight it made my migraine go away, and that was just the batter!

Eat his cheesecake tomorrow, gain superpowers. It could make a pretty good Friday, huh?


I give up. I surrender. Please just go away and let me be! You have made me into a completely worthless individual today!


Just to share what a super kid I have: In an attempt to combat these terrible headaches I’m having, I quit drinking diet pop. I really gave up caffeine for the most part. I can’t say it’s really helping, but I’m trying. I’ve hardly had any caffeine other than the occasional coke in the last week.

Yesterday was hard because I had to work in the evening. I gave in and gave my son a dollar to run down to Casey’s to get me a can of Coke. He happily complied and it did help.

This morning I got up and came downstairs. He was sitting on the couch with a dollar in his hand. “What’s that for?” I asked him.

“Oh, it’s mine. I thought I’d bring it just in case you need something today mom.”

He’s my favorite today.

In conclusion…

So I am off of caffeine for the most part.  I’m still getting headaches, but not as bad.  So we’ll see.


Graceful thing that I am, I dropped and broke my glasses.  Fortunately it was time to make an appointment anyway.  I got the indestructable flexon glasses, and they are PURPLE!!!!!

New glasses!

New glasses!

I just watched my cat flip a vhs tape across the floor and proceed to attack it… That’s right, make sure it’s dead.


Newsflash: Frozen hashbrowns are not a ready to eat food (says on the package).


The following is me online trying to find a new weight workout now that I’m running. Keep in mind I’m not a beginner, I’ve been lifting for many years:

Oh… I don’t want to watch a video…
That girl looks too happy, I can’t do that workout. Seriously, she’s enjoying that swiss ball waaaaay too much.
Our gym doesn’t have kettlebells.
I really don’t care what Reese Witherspoon does, thank you.
Last time I checked I’m not a man.

Yeah, still haven’t found a new workout…


Evil Genius:  “How much snow do we have? 3 inches under the dog. Is that a standard measuring system?”


Bad things to use as a bookmark for your library book #6: Your birth certificate.  True story… Not me, fortunately, but some other poor soul that is probably wondering where it went.  I sent it back to the library it came from.


So upcoming things… The Professor starts baseball on Sunday.  This will be interesting for him, having to deal with other people in a team situation.  I may drink a lot the next two months.

In the next few months I will be running three 5Ks and a half marathon.  Am I crazy?  Pretty much.  I’m finally starting to see results.  Next month may very well be the running edition!

Now… don’t run away, check out these amazing people below.  You know you wanna…(My apologies to Karen, I really didn’t want to be late with this.  I still love you and will be ON TIME next month!  XOXO)                          Baking In A Tornado                          Spatulas on Parade                          Follow me home                          Menopausal Mother                        Stacy Sews and Schools                                   Battered Hope                                  Just A Little Nutty                                        The Momisodes                            Someone Else’s Genius                            Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                                Disneyland in Kentucky                            Juicebox Confession                      Searching for Sanity                                      Go Mama O

January 2015 Fly on the Wall: The Naked Firefighting Edition

Fly on the WallWelcome to this month’s Fly on the Wall.  This is the edition that really should be entitled Sarah No Longer Knows How to Use WordPress Because They Changed Things and That Makes Her Sad.  I already had a headache.  This did not help.

Fly on the Wall is a compilation of random snippets from daily life that aren’t really enough to make a whole blog post on their own. Participating bloggers all post these simultaneously so you get more bang for your buck, or something like that.  Check the links down at the bottom of this post for many more glimpses into other people’s lives!

So here’s what went on this month…

So we celebrated Christmas in the usual way.  There were presents and a big dinner.  The kids spent most of the day playing with their loot.

Then, the day after Christmas my husband put out a fire naked, because that’s how things go in our house.

That’s right.  Put out a fire.  Naked.

Apparently when you don’t get bits of potato that bubble over out of an already overfilled pan, and they get down into your oven, they catch on fire when you try to preheat your oven for pizza.

It was a bit smoky, and I went to check to see what it was all about, and there were flames shooting up out of the bottom of the oven.

So naturally I yell to my husband.  “The oven is on fire!” thinking that he is out of the shower.

But instead he was still in, and came running out to put out the fire.  Naked.  And wet.

Needless to say, the fire got put out, we had Taco Bell for supper, and my husband now has another story to tell that either makes people laugh or makes them uncomfortable.

His mother had to ask the question:  “Why didn’t you stop and put something on?”

Evil Genius:  “That’s the difference between you and me.  You stop to put on clothes, you burn up in a fire.  I get things done.”

(Needless to say, I did not post any pictures of this event.)

So that was the highlight of our Christmas Break, what was yours?

10903965_10202806013100840_4904101491691211625_oWe let The Professor watch Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure, because he loves historical stuff.  That counts, right?  The Princess wasn’t nearly as interested, though she had to pipe up after the whole “69 Dudes!” part:  “Wow, 69 must be their lucky number!”  Yes honey, that’s right.


Our New Year was the Cheeseball New Year.  I was sent out to buy multiple packages of cream cheese so that Evil Genius and The Princess could make all kinds of cheeseballs.  They ended making a pizza one, a Hawaiian one, and a Honey Dijon one.  I liked the Hawaiian one-it had ham and pineapple in it, among others.  I really do think that by the end of the break, Evil Genius and the kids were officially sick of eating that kind of food!

Cheeseball.  Pizza Cheeseball.

Cheeseball. Pizza Cheeseball.

Evil Genius and the kids were watching a show about a potato chip factory. They were mesmerized. The Professor decided that this would be his future workplace, even after I informed him that you don’t get to eat chips while you work.



Mmmmmmm… Minecraft…

Hawaiian Punch and a printable Creeper picture taped to it generated more excitement than anything else in this house.  Who'd have thought that would happen?

Hawaiian Punch and a printable Creeper picture taped to it generated more excitement than anything else in this house. Who’d have thought that would happen?

The Professor’s tenth birthday was this January.  We did everything Minecraft.  From the cake to the homemade decorations.  Everything.  Minecraft.  Who knew that downloaded a bunch of stuff from the internet and making all your own everything would be such a hit!  The kids are still talking about it.  Mom wins.


Last Saturday ESPN Gameday came to Iowa State.  Evil Genius and the kids were there!  They both made a sign.

The Princess’s sign was extra sparkly.

10683536_10204047277119139_4844515838338383969_oThe Professor?  Not so much a fan of sparkles.

10926329_10204047277159140_6143067923615902243_oTo balance everything out, after Gameday Evil Genius went over to the Comic Book Store and competed in his first Magic Tournament.  Nerd.


I’m currently at the end of Week 6 in my Couch to 5K Training.  I haven’t died yet.  I have two weeks left, and I’m actually running.  What’s next you say?  A run in the cold on the first Saturday in February.  Two more 5Ks in warmer weather as I’m doing the 5K to 10K program.  Then Dam to Dam at the end of May, which is a half marathon.  Yes.  That’s when I’ll die.  It’s been nice knowing you all.

Coming soon, I’ll be published in another anthology.  I know, what’s up with that????  I’ll have details ASAP!

So that was our month.  How was yours?  What are other bloggers doing?  Check it out belowwwwwwww….                          Baking In A Tornado                          Spatulas on Parade                          Follow me home                          Menopausal Mother                        Stacy Sews and Schools                                   Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                    Juicebox Confession                              Battered Hope          Eileen’s Perpetually Busy                                  Go Mama O                       Someone Else’s Genius                             Just A Little Nutty                                       The Momisodes

December 2014 Fly on the Wall: The Extra Bearded Edition

Fly on the WallWelcome to the December edition of the Fly on the Wall.  If you haven’t been here before, here’s a simple explanation:  These are snippets of life from my house.  I am simultaneously posting these snippets along with other participating bloggers.  Please, please, pretty please stop by the links of the other participants at the bottom of the post or you may find reindeer poop in your stocking!!!!!

We last left our superheroes starting to get ready for Thanksgiving dinner… We hosted Thanksgiving again this year.  We had Evil Genius’s now traditional turkey in a bucket and the not so traditional turkey made of cheese, sausage, and crackers…

10620237_10203670796387356_8976289056525414897_oWords uttered the week of Thanksgiving:  “It’s Tuesday. Do you know where your turkey bucket is?”


My parents came up for Thanksgiving. Can you tell who the dog was most taken with?

Conversations held on Thanksgiving in our house:

Me to the Professor: “Are your pants on inside out?”
The Professor: “Oh.” Looks down at his pants, inspects them for a bit. “I guess they are” (Goes right back to watching tv).
Evil Genius: “Go fix them please!”

Tell me, what is wrong with this picture?

Tell me, what is wrong with this picture?

Now we are busy prepping for Christmas here at the house of nuts Almond.

There was Christmas shopping.  He bought himself an early present.  He's so good to him.

There was Christmas shopping. He bought himself an early present. He’s so good to him.

Here are the roles currently assumed by the people who occupy this place:

The Princess:  Craft Nazi
The Professor:  Christmas Expert
Evil Genius:  Evil Baker and Evil Chef
Me:  Space Occupier

The craft Nazi busy at work.  She wants to do crafts every second of every day!

The craft Nazi busy at work. She wants to do crafts every second of every day!

Me to The Princess: What are you going to make for Christmas gifts this year?
Princess: I don’t know.
Me (thinking I’m very smart and clever): Should we look on the internet for some ideas?
Princess: SURE!

I pull out my laptop and stupidly google “homemade gifts kids can make”. At search result #1, she gasps. At result #2 she squees… At result #154 she’s still ooing and ahhing.

An hour later, it’s quite apparent that she wants to make ALL the presents.
“All” as in every.single.craft on the internet. Be ready, people, be ready for all the crafts!

Evil Genius gets back from the ISU game to see me frantically trying to paint The Princess’s nails because it was bedtime and we had almost run out of time to do it.

Evil Genius: “I thought Moms enjoyed doing that with their daughters?”
Me: *Angry glare as I manage to paint my thumb holiday red*

Christmas nails.

Christmas nails.

Princess: Daddy what’s in these enchiladas?
Evil Genius: Chicken, sour cream, cheese, cumin-
Princess: Ew, HUMAN????
Evil Genius: No, CUMIN!

Rest assured that all of the cooking the Evil Genius does is 100% human free!

One thing that has recently come out of the Evil Genius's kitchen: Chocolate Peanut Butter trees!  (Yes they washed their hands but apparently not their faces!)

One thing that has recently come out of the Evil Genius’s kitchen: Chocolate Peanut Butter trees! (Yes they washed their hands but apparently not their faces!)

Speaking of holidays, today marks a special day.  After a few months of growth, my husband will finally be allowed to shave his beard.  They were not allowed to even trim them lest pay the fine of $100!  The picture below is almost three weeks old, so his beard is much scragglier even now.  There will be a lot of happy wives this weekend.  I hope to get a before and after picture that I can share!

He looks annoyed, but he loves it when she cuddles with him, because at least she's warm!

He looks annoyed, but he loves it when she cuddles with him, because at least she’s warm!

That’s all I’ve got.  Have a Happy Holiday!  And be sure to check out the links down below this picture of Christmas cuties or they just might very well tell Santa on you!

IMG_3288This month’s Fly Participants.  Give them a round of buzzzzzzzzzzzz…                          Baking In A Tornado                                Just A Little Nutty                                          The Momisodes                          Spatulas on Parade                          Follow me home                 Stacy Sews and Schools                          Menopausal Mother                            Battered Hope                                 Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                    Juicebox Confession                                     Risa Nye               The Bergham’s Life Chronicles                          Cluttered Genius