Post Apocalyptic Hello Kitty and Grandpa Snake… Adventures in Imagination

Imagination is a very powerful thing.  My daughter has no shortage of imagination.  That’s why I’m almost a little worried.

Lately she has been begging me to play with her.  Pet Shop.  Barbies.  Hello Kitty.  But it’s not necessarily how you’d think she’d play.

The world of Hello Kitty, complete with weapons, torture, and a giant chicken.

Take Hello Kitty.  Princess Imagination has several of the Hello Kitty lego sets.  These Hello Kitties are not your run of the mill kitties.  They apparently exist in a post-apocalyptic society.  I noticed the kitties had assorted weapons-guns, swords, and axes.  “What are the weapons for?”  I innocently asked.  “They have to protect themselves against the bad guys.”  “Who are the bad guys?”  “The ones who try to steal their candy.”  Those are desperate measures, kitties.  I never realized how violent those cute little things could be.  I’ve noticed some lego guys without arms hanging out there too.  Not sure if they tried to steal candy, or if it’s some form of mutation from the fallout.  Speaking of mutation, there’s also a giant chicken.  Most recently she added the Death Star.  She said its the garage.  Makes you wonder what others say when they approach the Hello Kitty residence.  “That’s not a moon, that’s a space station.  No wait, it’s just a garage.”

I should have known the situation here when she announced all her Hello Kitties were in her room having a battle.

Oh the Barbies have to be the most fun.  Because we girls can do anything, right Barbie?  She has all of my old

Grandpa Snake is caught in many compromising positions.

Barbies.  I not only had the regular buxom blondes but also the Heart Family parents, kids, and grandparents.  Her favorite Barbie is the Heart Family Grandpa.  She latched on to him right away.  He was the first one she named.  “He’s Grandpa Snake.”  Grandpa Snake keeps some pretty interesting company, after all there is a LOT of nudity going on at this Barbie house (note the picture).  When the Barbies take a trip anywhere in their purple Volkswagon Beetle, she makes sure they take the toilet with them.  It’s in the trunk, because you just never know when you’ll have to really go!  A lot of Barbies seem to go missing their heads, which makes me think that they only think they are the only one.  I haven’t found a headless body laying next to a sword yet, but I’m sure it’s only a matter of time.

I can only surmise what happened here… Barbie got the baby all ready to go out, then decide to take one quick naked roll around the house. Was knocked unconscious in a freak naked rollerskating accident…

I can’t really say anything… she is the daughter of a strange person with a rather big imagination.  Stay tuned for more adventures…

Truths of My Household: Random Observations of a Tired Mom

I find the following in my life to be true at the moment:

If a woman gets up at the crack of dawn to do any sort of exercise without distraction, the preschooler in the house knows it and will get up too.

There is no surface in the state of Iowa that my seven year old has not licked.

The state of my house is rapidly deteriorating.  I think there is a mathematical formula in there about the age of your children being inversely proportional to the cleanliness of the house.

If I would take the time to clean out my car, there would no longer be any starving children in China.  I believe there is enough uneaten food in the backseat to solve that problem.

The more I sleep, the more tired I am.  The less I sleep, well…

My children watch too much TV.  My seven year old son can tell you all about any drug they are currently marketing.  He wanted me to know that the shingles virus was already inside me.

No matter how clean your floor is your cat will puke on it.

If I recycled all the pop cans in my house and reused the aluminum from them, I think I could build a small car.

My children’s rooms are like a roach motel for everything.  It goes in but it never leaves.

If you are trying to get out of your house in a rush that is the day you will lose your keys.

The laundry hamper is five feet from the shower.   Why is that so hard to understand?

Why is it that we go through so much toilet paper, yet no one in this house actually seems to use it??

The more laundry I have to do, the more I admire nudists.

If you put your winter clothes away, it will get cold.  Then as soon as you pull them back out, it will ninety degrees.

The more I am away from my house, the less time I have to clean it.  The more I am home, the less motivation I have to clean it.

If it’s supposedly good for you, wait awhile, they’ll prove that it’s not.

My life is an endless string of dirtiness.  Dirty is the new clean.

The Barbie house is the melting pot of our household.  She turns away nobody.  Everything from My Little Ponies to plastic bugs go there to hang out.