Just Another Week in January Review

The Princess's latest art-we've decided it's a molecule.

We visited a friend on Friday and played and created.  The Princess’s resulting latest art-we’ve decided it’s a molecule.

Here it is Sunday again.  We have freezing rain, isn’t that lovely?  Fortunately, everything here is pretty much iced in, so we have a good excuse for NOT going anywhere today.  That means my husband is hiding in the bedroom playing Skyrim, and I am tortured with kids’ television while I try to catch up on some REALLY important work.  Wait a minute, I stay home every day…

Many of my blogger friends are participating in the Circle of Moms Top 25 Funny Moms 2013.  I got as far as staring at the registration form, but can’t bring myself to do it.  I’m not a big self promoter, but I am curious how far I could go in it.  Included in the running is Menopausal Mother, the blog I guest posted on this week, as well as many other blogs.  Guess what? I found out you can vote for as many people as you want!  If I change my mind  about doing it, I guess you’ll see my blog up there with the rest of them.  UPDATE:  Oh hell, I did it, as you can see by the sidebar… so I’m “pending” if you would like to cast your vote.

Here’s all the fun stuff I did this week:

Monday  Mr Coffee/Superhero/Robot Make Me Some Coffee!  The perils of owning an automatic coffeemaker, in that its not as automatic as we would like it to be…

Tuesday  How Mr Ed Could Interview for a Retail Job  The group interview where I think they would have taken anyone.  ANYONE!

Wednesday  I took a mental health day.  It didn’t help, I’m still insane.

Thursday  Theme Thursday: Breastfeeding Gave Me Super Powers Really, I wouldn’t lie to you about that.

Friday The Sadder But Wiser Girl Visits the Menopausal Mother  My first guest post-Twitter in Biblical times, with horrible reenactments by Barbies.  Go check it out, and read her hilarious blog while you’re there.

Saturday  REBLOG:  Where Have All the Humans Gone?  I voice my disdain for automated menus, and fantasize about having an automated mom menu.  It could totally happen.

I was also one of the featured blogs on Bloggers.com on Friday, I thought that was pretty cool!  If I can ever find an icon bigger than an eyelash, I’ll add it to my sidebar.  Why are they so teeny?  I don’t get it!

Posts By Others That I Loved This Week:
First, a confession.  I am terribly behind on my reading all of my beloved blogs, due to my pain in my neck.  Yes, it’s still there, not as bad as it was but it’s still somewhat bothersome.  I vacillate between thinking it’s just muscle strain and thinking that I’m dying of one of seven different dread diseases.  But enough about that, I’m hoping to get caught up for the week today, perhaps while sitting on the exercise ball or doing stretches.

However, there were a few great posts I DID read this week:

Chewed Gum and Other TreasuresNinja Mom  Because it’s happening at my house, right now.

The Dangers of Watching TV With KidsFunny is Family  Watching grown up TV with kids can be scary.  I find it disturbing that my kids hear the word “trans vaginal mesh” and want to know what “mesothelioma” is…

Cats are Aliens and Bed Real EstateParenting, Illustrated With Crappy Pictures  This explained so much to me…
(By the way, if you ever want to buy me a present she has her own “Crappy Shop” now!)

Best Search Engine Terms of the Week:

Troll farting glitter-No, I distinctly said unicorns fart glitter, not trolls.

Toilet girl tube-Hmmmm… I know how they found my blog but what the heck were they looking for?

Homemade fart-I thought all farts were homemade.

Fast cheese puns-Sorry, we only have slow cheese puns here.

Cats in cars-All I can think of is “All cats in cars, ALL THE TIME!”

Herpes must suck-No idea.

That’s all I’ve got.  Have a great rest of your weekend, and let’s be careful out there!  I mean that literally…

Maybe I just need to use the cat as a pillow?

Maybe I just need to use the cat as a pillow?

How Mr Ed Could Interview for a Retail Job

It really has nothing to do with this post, but it made me smile.

It really has nothing to do with this post, but it made me smile.

I’ve had a recent uptick in readership, and this is very exciting for me!  I’ve gone from a handful of followers to over 500 in a little over half a year.  It’s wonderful and at the same time a little scary for me.  It just so happens that I have been having a period of a couple of weeks where the ideas just are not flowing like I would like them to be.  I don’t want to disappoint, especially people that are just starting to read my work.  At the same time, I’m trying not to be on the computer so much and focus on my family more.  I am on here a lot between applying for jobs, networking, writing, keeping up with this blog and others, and working on my web page.  You could say it’s a lot of work not having a job!  Ironic, isn’t it?

An explanation to those new to my blog: I’ve been unemployed for going on six months now, with the exception of a few contracted cpr jobs here and there.  It’s not something that I want to get into the details of because, well, I don’t wanna.  Though as you can imagine it weighs a bit on my mind.  Add to that the fact that I’ve been sick for what seems like forever.  And on top of it all, we are having very cold weather with “dangerous” windchills.  When I can’t get outside at all, I get reeeeeeally moody.  Therefore I’m not real inspired, at least not this week.  When I’m writing about my coffeemaker, I’m stretching it a bit.  Ok, a lot.

Anyway, back to the whole not working thing…  For those keeping track, I had a “group interview” two weeks ago for a job at a large discount clothing store opening in our area.   Anyone could walk in and be interviewed in a group. I could have been a talking horse or a plate of jello, but since I went to their website I was immediately invited to do the group thing (as in the interview, not as in that other “group” thing-get your mind out of the gutter!).  I didn’t have high hopes for it, as a matter of fact I almost cancelled, but figured I could use the interview experience and you just never know.  I’m an optimist-there’s some of that “hope” stuff left in me.

As I think back to all of the people that were in the interview and the ones I saw coming through for the next one, I wondered who the heck they would end up hiring (for the record, there were no talking horses present, at least not at the one I went to).  There was the guy who looked almost exactly like Jimmy from Raising Hope but said very little.  There was a girl who reminded me of Luna from Harry Potter. She may not have looked like her, but every time she spoke she sounded and acted freakishly like her. And then there was THIS girl: “OMG, I used to work at Hollister and it really sucked because it was dark and I fell asleep there EVERY freakin day!”  Yet somehow I think that was the girl they ended up hiring.

Obviously I was not one of the ones they hired.  It took them very little time to send that rejection letter.  I wouldn’t be surprised if they had already put it in the mail before I left the parking lot.  I shouldn’t even be remotely surprised.  After all, they did take anyone who applied.  If a talking horse actually had applied and shown up for the interview, we would have probably had equal chances.  Though I thought I had an in, considering the guy conducting the whole thing had been the one who did the last interview I had somewhere else.  Guess it wasn’t them, guess it WAS me.

sheldon suck

I’m not really upset because it was a retail job that paid minimum wage.  On the other hand, I would love to find any way to bring in some extra income at the moment, because of the lack of odd jobs and extra things that I’ve always done in the past!  It makes me wonder why I couldn’t at least be considered for that kind of work.  So I’m kind of bummed, and left wondering in that respect.  Although my husband is gainfully employed at a wonderful company, I really need a job or some sort of income (*ahem* paid writing jobs perhaps?) because we are behind on our bills and I’m not so good at this homemaker thing.  I can’t pay a lot of my bills because I don’t have a job.  Since I don’t have a job, I don’t have money.  Since I don’t have money, I DON’T HAVE MONEY!  😉

This reminds me of something, this from the movie Scrooged:

Frank Cross: You’re staying here with me. We’re working late.
Grace: But I have to take my son to the doctor.
Frank Cross: Grace! When I work late, You work late!
Grace: But I made the appointment two months ago!
Frank Cross: I care! We’re indivisible. If I’m working late, you gotta work late! If you can’t work late, I can’t work late! If I can’t work late, I CAN’T WORK LATE!

(It’s much better with the movie clip, but I couldn’t find one!)

If only I could get job offers from my command of movie quotes, I’d be living the high life.

Despite all the money worries, I am very happy to be able to spend so much time with my kids.  They are the reason WHY it’s such a big worry, but they are also the thing that drives me to try to find my niche.  I hope that all of the frustration, all of the rejection, all of the not hearing anything from some of these businesses is all part of my little journey of finding out what I’ve really been put here on this earth to do.  I’ve written about the fact that I feel like it should be coming to the denouement quite soon (the final resolution of the intricacies of a plot, as of a drama or novel-I had GREAT English teachers in high school which is why I know what this is).  If My Life Were A Movie I’d Hire Better Writers.  But like any good story, there are additional twists and turns in the plot that have to totally throw me off.  Like a mystery, except I’m not a big fan of mysteries…

It's a mystery.  I don't like mysteries.

It’s a mystery. I don’t like mysteries.

For other funny but disturbing stories about my job search, you can check these out:
What I Think Potential Employers Are REALLY Saying About Me
The Job Search:  How It’s Kind of Like Dating

Captain’s Log Stardate -309967.53450025356 The Week in Review

I concur. *pop* *pop*

I concur. *pop* *pop*

Disclaimer:  This post may contain the following words-boob, poop, naked, zombie.  Discontinue reading if these offend you.   Hey, ever notice that boob is poop upside down?

Monday  The ADD Kitchen Chapter 3:  Why Duff Goldman Will Never Hire Me  I reminisce about boob cakes, and display batman cake fails and sort of wins.

Tuesday  Printer Purgatory  I resist the urge to kick the crap out of my printer.

Wednesday  Zoinks!  Kids Cartoon Fears and the Container Mystery  My kids are afraid of Scooby Doo, and my tupperware is MIA.

Thursday  Cats and Dogs, Disliking Each Other In My Home Since 2012 If it were seriously my cat vs my dog, I’m pretty sure the cat would win.

Friday  January Secret Subject Swap:  Like Mother Like Daughter, Except When We’re Not  The second time I’ve participated in the Secret Subject Swap!  How my Mom and I are alike, and how I wish I could be more like her.

Saturday  Reblog:  Have Fun Storming the Castle!  I explore the other affliction in our household besides the recessive gene.

Other Good things this week (besides my posts):

The boob cake may be famous.  I’m not holding my breath, but it may be featured in Craft Fail’s  book.  It’s ok if it’s not, but I thought it was cool that they would even consider it.  As I looked at more pictures of it, I about died laughing at how funny it looks…

Take THAT Madonna!

Take THAT Madonna!

And check out Craft Fail sometime.  I love it. They even quoted me on it and stuff.  They also have a Twitter page.

I had a job interview.  A group job interview.  No it’s not as fun as it sounds.  They pretty much took anyone who got on their website.  Do I have a chance?  Maybe.  My advice to anyone who does one is to NOT go right home and google how the company is to work for.  DO NOT DO THIS!

I finally got to work on my personal website.  Don’t everyone get all excited, it’s still a long way from being done, but it’s called Serendipitous Sarah and is supposed to help promote my writing.  Maybe even *gasp* help me land a paid writing job someday.  I’ll let y’all know when it’s “live” or whatever you kids are calling it these days…

AND I’m finally on the mend.  At least I think I am. Unless this is disease’s sucky way of tricking me.  Now my husband has it.

Best post of the week by a blogger way more famous than me:

Hey kids, don’t stick your tongue in there, m’kay?  The Bearded Iris.  I think I broke something laughing.  If you don’t have a “licker” in the house, you may not find this funny.

Odd things of the week:

I’m not sure if I’m flattered or just plain weirded out that Ore Ida follows me on Twitter…
I’ve got escort services commenting on my blog.  I’m used to the sex spam, but really?  Thank goodness for Askimet.

Weird and Disturbing Search Engine Terms this week:

Beautiful girls pooping-yes we all poop, even the beautiful people-do you really wanna see that?

Missing my zombie-I miss my zombie too when he’s missing.  I’m referring to my husband who doesn’t sleep much, what are you referring to?

The family water bra-How exactly is this a family bra?  Does the family all fit in it?  Or do they take turns wearing it?

“Jill Taylor” Ironman-???????

Snowmen Doing Yoga-I kind of want to see that too

So afraid I wet my knickers-People still wear knickers?

Purses with cats on them-In them, perhaps, but not on.

Girl you make me wanna get you pregnant-How the holy heck did this find my blog?  Inquiring minds want to know.

Big furry girl-Mmm-hmmm.  I DID skip a day shaving my legs this week.

Naked Grandpa-I could almost understand it if this picture was used in one of my blog posts:

HA HA HA!  I love this picture.

HA HA HA! I love this picture.

For the record, I don’t know where this photo originally came from.  But if you follow DeBie Hive on Facebook, you can see truly funny stuff like this all the freakin time!  OK, a lot of the time.  I love this lady-check her out!    https://www.facebook.com/debie.hive  http://debiehive.blogspot.com/

That’s all I’ve got.  I’m posting and moving on.  I have a webpage to work on.