A Poem Not By Henry Gibson: Ode to Unemployment


And for your reading displeasure,  another awful poem by The Sadder But Wiser Girl:

Ode To Unemployment

(I got tired of looking at jobs, so I wrote a poem)

Unemployment, unemployment, you’re sucking my brain.

If this continues, I may go insane.

My lack of money is totally lame.

My lack of skills is causing me shame.

I’ve had no phone calls and no interviews

I lie on my couch and drift off for a snooze.

Sometimes I contemplate having some booze

Some days I don’t even put on my shoes.

Other days I don’t even dare

To think about putting on underwear.

Why are these things that I choose to share?

It all just doesn’t really seem fair.

I wear warm up pants and exercise shorts

(Which is funny because I don’t play any sports)

Most days I feel so out of sorts

I’m longing to network and find some cohorts.

My husband works a million hours a week

While a job I do continue to seek.

I hope that my roof does not start to leak.

For havoc upon my budget it would wreak.

Now hear me whine and moan and sob

(Son, please stop licking that doorknob!)

Please please please please let me find a job.

Before I become a total slob.

It’s not just me. Even the Klingons are having a hard time.