Let’s Build Something Together, Shall We? Like A Paycheck…

Job interview humor. Gotta love Ziggy.

I have a job interview tomorrow.  At Lowes of all places!  I think that’s kind of cool.

I’m interested in this because 1) It’s different from anything else I’ve ever done 2) It’s retail in a way but not in the high pressure sales sense and 3) It’s weekends and maybe nights here and there, opposite my husband’s schedule.  Not to mention that shopping there is something I consider pretty fun, and I’m a girl.  I’ve done the math-I can make just as much working less hours if I don’t pay for childcare.  No offense, childcare people.  You are some of the most under appreciated and underpaid people out there!  I know because I could be working in childcare right now, but that ironic situation keeps presenting itself-you care for other people’s children but you don’t make enough to pay for your own child’s care.  I figured up that I’d make $20 less for half the hours spent at work.  This isn’t laziness speaking, this is common sense.

Oh come on, I’ve seen The Money Pit enough times. That qualifies me for a job at Lowes, right?

So how does one prepare for an interview for a home improvement store job?

I think I’ll start by getting in a couple episodes of House Crashers and Bath Crashers.  Then I’ll go outside and hammer some nails into some wood, and follow that up with some speed drilling.  I’ll lift full cans of paint for strength training.  Then I should probably study up on different kinds of tools and appliances, just in case there’s a test.  Finally, I’ll research the names of different types of pipes and fittings.  Now if I could just remember what position I applied for.  I DO remember filling out the application online, because there were about 76,000 questions on it.

Although I call a lot of things “thingies”, I know what all of these are really called.

It became apparent pretty quickly that I was going to have to find SOMETHING after my job ended.  I have been putting applications at quite a variety of places.  But there have been criteria, it’s not like I was throwing myself at any place that was a business.  If it was a place that I knew I’d despise working at, then I didn’t bother.  I know I need a job, but I also need my sanity.  Part-time where I can still be with the kids most of the time and still pursue writing, or full-time if it paid enough to justify putting the younger one back in childcare.  I haven’t heard back from anyone other than two childcare centers that I can’t afford to work at (see paragraph 2), and I have my theories as to why here.  I’m not saying that working weekends and the occasional evening is ideal.  The Princess has already put her foot down and told me that I can’t ever get a job because she’d miss me too much.  She also told me the same thing when I left her with her dad while I got groceries the other night, but her tune quickly changed after she was given ice cream with lots of syrup after supper.

I’m not holding my breath about this one, or anything at this point.  I’m just happy that someone thought I was worth interviewing.  I’ll keep ya’ll posted on how it went.

This is me in a job interview. Sometimes I even surprise myself at what comes out of my mouth.