Support Groups for Bloggers That Don’t Exist That Really Should

Wonder what this group's name would be?

This cartoon just cracks me up!

Do you remember my post about Procrastination Support Groups?  Most people don’t, but it was one I had written some time ago that made me laugh hysterically as I wrote it and perhaps made two other people in the world laugh.  You can read the link HERE if you wish.

I’m in a couple of different groups for bloggers that help me tremendously.  I started thinking as I chatted with Kate of Can I Get A Bottle of Whine With My Morning Quiet Time one evening.  It suddenly came to me-what if there were actual support groups that bloggers could join if they needed help with certain things?  And it went downhill from there…

Having technical issues with your blog?  Don’t understand how it all works?
Never fear, you can join B.U.T.T.S-Bloggers Undergoing Tremendous Technical Stress

Or this one:  W.H.A.T.-Writers Helping Acute Technophobes

Tired of spam? Then this group is for you!
B.R.A.S.-Bloggers Rallying Against Spammers

Are you sick of reading blogs by people who slept through English class?
I could so join this one in a heartbeat:
C.A.G.S-Crimes Against Grammar and Spelling.

Are you one of those people and are admittedly in need of help?  How about joining R.A.W.M.E.A.T.-Read And Weep, My Editing is Always Dreadful

Spending too much time blogging?  Then you need a support group!
I.N.E.E.D.B.I.B.S-I Never Eat, Excrete, or Dream Because I’m Blogging Seriously

AND there are some that sadly just need to join this group.
B.O.O.B.S-Bloggers Obviously Only Being Stupid.

What support group do you think you need to join?  Don’t you think the world would be a better place if these actually existed?

This may very well be taking place in my front yard very soon.

This is what happens when you don’t find good support.

In my pain induced haze, I didn’t realize that my ranty post about shrinking clothing was being featured today over at The Epistolarians.  Please come over and read A Rant on the Disappearance of Clothing in America by moi.  Now enough about me, I’m going to go ice my neck.

The Getting To Know The Blogger Challenge: The Top Posts

I’m doing the Getting To Know The Blogger Challenge sponsored by A Little Unhinged.

12. Your top 5 posts and why you think they were successful.

Hmmmmm… Ummmmmmm…. Uhhhhhhhhhhh….

Ok, I’ve got this:

1)   The one that started it all-Does This Look Infected To You?

The dog didn’t get shingles, my husband did.

My husband went on a business trip and came home with shingles.  It practically wrote itself.  And it was all downhill from that one.

2)  The one that almost didn’t get published-Indiana Jones and the Evil Couch of Doom (aka Crap I Found In My Couch)

Is it an eeeeevil couch?

A poem I wrote one day after cleaning. I deleted it, but then rescued it from the trash.  My husband shared it with his coworkers and they actually liked it!

3)  The one that made people either laugh or say HUH?-The Sadder But Wiser Girl, Poop Detective

“I’ve got something in my diaper and it’s not a toaster.”

Trying to laugh about rejection, I started thinking of jobs that I KNOW I could do.  Hence the very strange but definitely unique blog post.  And also one of the most visited on my blog, shockingly enough.

4)  One of my personal favorites-Yo, P.E.E.P.s and P.O.O.P.s! A Support Group That Doesn’t Exist That Really Should

Wonder what this group’s name would be?

This one bounced around in my head for a long time before coming to fruition.  I’m glad I finally got it all out of there.

5)  The one that I think I am most proud of-Lessons From Kids:  Life Is Short, Play Naked

Honorable mentions:

The Five Stages of Dishes, From Procrastination to Exasperation

The Recessive Gene:  My Pool Needs A Lifeguard

A little DNA humor for you.

If Unicorns Fart Glitter and Poop Rainbows, Where Does Glitter Glue Come From?

Post Apocalyptic Hello Kitty and Grandpa Snake…Adventures in Imagination

Grandpa Snake is caught in many compromising positions.

Whoever Has The Brain Today Please Stand Up:  When ADD People Marry Each Other

Yo, P.E.E.P.s and P.O.O.P.s! A Support Group That Doesn’t Exist That Really Should

Wonder what this support group’s name would be?  I hope they have an acronym, because I like cool acronyms.

I think I need to join a support group.

Today I stood looking at the pile of laundry that is getting pretty tall.  I don’t do getting off track a little, I do it to extremes.  I forget to do laundry for a few days, and then it’s out of control.  Some of it is forgetfulness, a lot of it is procrastination.  EXTREME PROCRASTINATION!  Speaking of, I really hope my husband wore pants to work today.  I threw in laundry after 10 pm last night-that was when I realized that I had seriously neglected laundry.  He had no clean pants, so genius that I am I threw every pair he owned into the washing machine.  I had every intention of one of us putting it in the dryer, but then we both went to bed.

They know where I live, they can come after me if they had to look at his boxer briefs all day.

Don’t worry, I don’t think he owns any thongs. Or cut off t-shirts for that matter.

We’ve watched a few episodes of Matthew Perry’s Go On this year.  It’s funny, though not the fall over laughing funny I figured it would be.  Support groups are funny, right?  I decided that there needs to be some sort of support group for people like me.  You know, people who procrastinate.

All cool groups have an acronym for their name.  I can’t quite decide what this support group should be called.  I have it narrowed down to two different acronyms.  The first one I came up with was P.E.E.P.-“Parents Experiencing Extreme Procrastination”.  Come on, that’s cool, right?  If you had to go to a meeting, no one would have to know, and you certainly wouldn’t have to lie.  You could just tell people you were going to hang out with your peeps.  Total truthfulness, right there…

The other one I came up with was P.O.O.P-“People Overcoming Overt Procrastination”.  Poop gets people attention.  And you wouldn’t necessarily have to lie about that one either.  Just tell people you have to go to poop.  Now in my situation that would never work because I haven’t been in the bathroom alone since 2005.  I either have a child, a dog, or a cat with me.

I really think this is what goes through everyone’s heads in our house when I am in the bathroom…

Imagine the meeting.  “Hi my name is Maria.  I haven’t folded laundry in 3 years.  I also can’t find any of my socks.”

“My name is Sherman, I haven’t mowed my lawn in three months.  I was planning on doing it tomorrow.”

“Hi I’m Willow, I have been wanting to redo my son’s nursery. He graduates from high school next week.”

So about the name, should we put it to a vote?  Or should I find something different if I get around to it, because P.E.E.P. is too weird and nobody wants to come to a group that implies feces of any kind?

Of course, I’m not sure if this type of support group would actually work because people would procrastinate about coming.  “Oh, maybe I’ll do it next week.”  I rather imagine it would never even get started, because the person in charge of promoting it would wait to do it.

As a matter of fact, I’m procrastinating right now writing this, because I have to chop down the laundry mountain.  And fold it.  Yeah, I’m an expert.  Perhaps I should become a Procrastination Consultant?  Well…I’ll do it tomorrow.