Will and Grace water bra | The Sadder But Wiser Girl

OMG I am so embarrassed!

What a way to start a day! After fighting with my four year old for what seemed like hours about, well, everything from getting clothes on her letting me brush her hair, I was finally able to get into the shower. Finally, a few moments of peace! I have my giant bottle of shampoo turned upside down to try to get out the very last bit that’s in there before I need to break into a new bottle. Gotta save wherever I can you know. Just as I flipped the lid and squirted the small amount that was left of it into my hand, Princess Tantrum storms in and flings open the shower door to announce that the “Bop-It was not listening” to her. I groaned and reminded her that there is nothing I can do while I am covered in water. She pouted and slammed the door. Then I proceeded to take the glob of shampoo in my hand and rub it all over my body.

WHAT DID I JUST DO? Did I just do that? Yes I did. So much for trying to save that last little bit. On one hand, it is smoothing shampoo, which means that all the fine little hairs on my arms and legs should be very smooth. On the other hand, what a waste. I was able to get enough out to wash my hair correctly after the incident. And I did follow up with the proper shower gel, even though I was probably plenty clean from the shampoo (I doubt it deoderizes). I didn’t notice any difference in body hair smoothness, though.

Definitely not my most stellar moment. But not necessarily my worst either. At least I had no witnesses this time. There have been so, so, SO many times that I have been distracted and done something so weird/funny/embarrassing that I am pretty sure I can write a book.

Since I couldn’t find an appropriate “embarrassing shower moments” image, this will do. Who could forget this hilarious episode of humiliation? Grace and the leaky water bra.

Some of my more interesting moments:

When we were young and broker than we are now, I used to mix Crystal Light in leftover milk containers (I washed them first). One morning I got up, apparently on the wrong side of the bed, and proceeded to pour Crystal Light on my cereal. Yum. That is a moment that comes up quite a bit in our household moments that we’d rather forget.

Around that same time in my life, I went to the Recreation Center on campus to work out. I put my things away and took the pants off that I had over my shorts. I then proceeded to start to take my shorts off. You don’t take your shorts off in the middle of a busy part of campus because everyone can SEE YOUR UNDERWEAR. Luckily, I think the people there were so wrapped up in their reps that no one saw my purple lacy undies.

Much more recently, I was doing laundry. I leaned down to put the laundry in the dryer and the hamper grabbed hold of my hair, and ripped a whole bunch out. Ouch.

One day while running out of my house in a hurry to get to a class I was teaching, I could not find my keys. I grabbed my spare keys and ran out the door. I returned home and turned the house upside down looking for the keys. Nothing. Days went by, then weeks. I finally got copies made and went on with my life. One day a couple of months later someone found a set of keys outside of town on the county road by the co-op. They were destroyed, but they were certainly my keys. Apparently I had left the keys in the lock in my trunk.

And of course, everyone knows the keys in the toilet story. Not familiar with it? Well, click here to read about it. Everyone must know about the toilet tractor beam. Everyone.

And there are so, so many more that I am sure I’m just not recalling these days. What embarrassing moments have you had? I also have some kid related ones too, but I’ll save those for another time…